New dating apps and companies like CasualHookup are designed to combat our culture’s obsession with finding « the one » right away. That’s not to say there’s no room for there to be more diversity in the love department. But if we’re lucky, it’s not a fetishists’ utopia — it’s a healthy, open, and liberated space for everyone.
You may know this already, but our sexual culture has a bit of a history of demonizing casual sex. In the late ’60s, the birth control pill was associated with promiscuity, and when early research studies associated oral contraceptives with an increased rate of STDs, the pill was targeted as the culprit. Since then, casual sex has been equated with prostitution, a cultural staple that remains taboo to this day.
When it comes to casual sex, it’s not that simple. There is no pill that can prevent STDs, and many of the consequences of casual sex are not directly related to the lack of protection. It’s also worth noting that there’s a huge difference between casual sex and having casual sex with people who are « using » you for sex.
Here’s a quick rundown of the biggest problems casual sex can cause.
One, you might get more than you bargained for. When you’re drunk, or taking drugs, and using sex as a hookup app, you’re putting yourself and your body at risk of getting nasty and super-uncomfortable in a variety of ways. If you’re too drunk to catch a cold, you can get super sick, and even die.
Some people find that they want more during sexual encounters, and maybe more than they initially want. That may lead to dissatisfaction and even a feeling of unfulfillment. Imagine that sexual prowess is actually a muscle, and it grows stronger as you get more use out of it. That’s why recreational sex might leave you feeling like a real stud. But if you stick to it long term, it could also leave you feeling fat, dissatisfied, and like you haven’t been anywhere near your sexual power.
It is very important to protect yourself. On CasualHookup, that is not a problem. You get to choose your own protection level. This also means that other people can’t control you. You can set your boundaries, and your hooks should be clear.
Additionally, there are a lot of long-term issues to consider too. It’s really important that you know and have prepared for sex. You can’t
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If you’re going on Tinder to get laid, chances are, you just want a quickie to get to the bottom of your feelings. But if you’re looking to have a more meaningful relationship, why are you into casual sex? What makes it preferable to a committed relationship? Here’s what: It’s much easier to do it with someone who’s not emotionally invested, and that means you don’t feel guilty or bad or worried about potentially having to break it off after getting what you want. Perhaps you want more and more, but casual sex is also much easier on your wallet.
And let’s be frank: If you date someone who treats you well or deeply, whether that’s on the romantical or something more platonic, then it’s going to be hard to casually mess with the emotional commitment of that person. Or even more importantly: It’s very, very hard to let someone else make you feel good, especially when there’s some monetary penalty attached.
Casual sex has not only been legitimized in recent years, but veritably been made the social standard, doesn’t mean that it’s always super healthy.
People who need to know that they’re having fun because it’s a means to an end, as opposed to an end in itself, are generally less attached in romantic and sexual ways to other people. This frees them up to have sex with strangers — think of how much you can just give a blowjob to someone you just met when you’re focused on yourself (in addition to letting go of a lot of serious emotions). You may encounter a lot of people who say they’re not looking for anything serious or long-term, but that might be just bravado. Casual sex — whether it’s on a swiping app or at the bar — is in many cases a way to weed out the people who aren’t serious.
If you’re dealing with a toxic or emotionally toxic person, casual sex may not be the place to be. Your partner may abuse you emotionally, attack you physically, do things that may even be illegal — sex is not the place to be safe from them, no matter what the sex.
Likewise, if your interest or desire to have casual sex is coming from the fear or anger you feel toward your partner — or if you’re doing it to punish your partner or to hurt them — well, casual sex probably isn’t for you. Casual sex comes from being a free person of a healthy mindset, not a person who feels damaged and endangered by a relationship and
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